Do you have a friend who is grieving the loss of a beloved dog or cat? If you have a pet yourself, you may understand your friend’s pain and want to comfort him or her. When owners deal with loss, they may even feel guilty that there are so many tragedies happening around the world. But grief is absolutely devastating, especially in today’s society where many people think of their dogs and cats as more than just pets. The grief your friend is experiencing may be close to or even equal to what he or she feels when he or she loses a human family member.
Furry Family Member
If you were raised to believe that your family dog or cat was “just an animal,” you may be less able to relate to the gut-wrenching pain your friend experiences when a beloved pet dies. You might even think his or her behavior is a bit exaggerated.
But it is important to remember that your friend’s dog or cat may be his or her only source of daily companionship and comfort. In today’s highly mobile society, it is not uncommon for people to have become disconnected from their support systems of family and friends. In fact, some people’s only daily close relationship may be with their dog or cat.
Even if you don’t understand the deep connection a person has with a dog or cat, you should still comfort your friend or family member in a manner similar to how you would treat a person he or she has just lost.
How to Comfort a Friend Who Has Lost their Pet: What To Do and What Not To Do
Here are some tips on what to do and what not to do when a friend is grieving the loss of a beloved pet.
What To Do:
1. Be there for your friend:
Even if you don’t know what to say when someone loses their pet, you can listen to your friend talk about his or her loss.You can guide your friend to talk about feelings and worries before, during, and after the loss. Let them tell “their story” as many times as they want. Or even just sit quietly with him or her and listen to him or her process his or her grief.
2. Send your friend a pet sympathy card or a small gift such as a plant, flowers, or custom projected photo jewelry:
I have seen many people who have lost their pets customize photos of themselves and their pets in projection photo bracelets and projection photo necklaces, and wear it on themselves at all times, so that they feel like their pets are always with them as before.
3. Offer to help:
Your friend may be too distracted to cook or even remember to eat, so consider bringing something to eat. Your friends may also ask you to help with small chores. For example, collect his or her pet’s belongings and store them out of sight until he or she is able to see them again.
4. Acknowledge that you may not have the right words to describe the situation:
Everyone grieves differently, so what you say to one person may unintentionally offend another. Let your friend know that while you may not always have the right words or answers, you will be there during this sad time.
5. Help them celebrate the loss of their loved one:
Offer suggestions to help them cope with their grief: provide them with ways to honor their pet. Help those who are grieving develop the rituals they need to get through the early difficult times: light a candle every day, show photos, clay paw prints, cut fur, write a love letter to a pet, plant a flower garden, make a garden stone mosaic, put your pet’s tag on a keychain, keep a journal, create a photo album, and more.
Some of the more popular ways to commemorate the occasion are, for example, you can buy a locket in which your friend can keep his or her pet’s fur. You can show your friend a framed photo of his or her dog or cat. Or like the customized projection bracelet or necklace paw I mentioned above, customize the pet’s photo into the bracelet or necklace. This way your friend can always bring out a keepsake to help ease the pain of missing their cat or dog.
6. Call your friends regularly and ask them how they are doing:
Call your friends regularly to show concern and ask them how they are doing, saying something like “I’ve been thinking about you and I wonder how you are.” And repeat the help you provide at a later time (days, months, years). Also consider asking him or her if he or she would like to go out for a walk, travel, or just want some company.
7. Help your friend with closure:
When a human family member dies, a funeral is often held, which can give loved ones a sense of closure. Your friend might appreciate a similar closure for his or her pet. For example, you and your friend might light a candle for his or her pet. Or you can offer to help scatter your dog or cat’s ashes in a special place.
8. Be forgiving:
Your friend may lash out at you for a comment you think is harmless or something you may or may not have done. Remember that he or she is in a hurting world right now; Don’t take any angry outbursts personally.
What Not To Do
1. Say his or her furry family member is just a dog or a cat:
That minimizes the pet’s importance in your friend’s life, which also minimizes his or her grief.
2. Suggest that your friend get another pet immediately:
Everyone reacts to death differently. Some pet owners feel such a hole in their lives that they want to bring home another dog or cat right away. And some people are so depressed that they vow never to get a dog or cat again. Whatever your friend decides, try to be supportive and non-judgmental.
3. Tell your friend that his or her beloved pet is in a better place:
Even if your pet has a disease like cancer, your friend may not be ready to accept that.
4. Set a time limit for your friend’s grief:
Don’t give advice to your friends like, “It’s been a month.” Shouldn’t you throw away your dog’s old collar? ” or “It’s been a year. “Shouldn’t you get a new pet?”
5. Say you understand how he or she feels:
Even if you’ve lost a pet before, everyone’s situation is slightly different. A more sensitive way to express this is to say, “I can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now.”.
6. Don’t be sad:
Your friend is in pain. It won’t help if you say things such as, “You could have it worse. You could have lost your brother like I just did.”. Let your friend grieve, but don’t make him or her feel like it’s wrong for him or her to be upset and sad about the loss of a pet.
7. Your friend may have a hard time recovering from the loss of his or her loyal companion and soulmate:
Be there for your friend – even if you’re not sure what to say or what not to say when your pet dies. Your presence is what matters the most.
In this process, understanding and sensitivity are key. Everyone handles the loss of a pet differently, so give your friend enough space and understanding to grieve and heal in their own way and time.
